10 Biggest and Most Costly Mistakes People Make in Life

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Life is one big vat of choices mixed together. Some good, some bad and some downright ugly. Sometimes it’s very difficult when you’re in the moment to determine how to make the best choice as an individual which is why, fortunately we as humans were blessed with the gift of learning from our mistakes. Now for some of us, myself included, this learning process could take several go-arounds before we finally get the hint not to do something but what can I say, some of us are more stubborn than others. Here are some of the biggest mistakes people make in life.

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“Learn from the mistakes of others. You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.”

– Eleanor Roosevelt

Failing to Follow Your Own Path

Many people wind up regretting living a life based on the expectations of others rather than following their own dreams and aspirations.

This could mean pursuing a career you’ve always dreamt of just because it's what your family wanted, or staying in a relationship that doesn’t bring you joy and fulfillment to avoid the idea of being alone or suppressing your true desires and interests for fear of judgment.

Facing the unknown and going out on a limb or outside your comfort zone can be downright terrifying, especially if you’re the type of person who prefers feeling ‘safe.’

A significant aspect of not failing to follow your own path is the failure to seize opportunities for fear of failure, rejection, or discomfort. This can ultimately lead to profound wondering, regret and a sense of lost time.

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Strive not to be a success, but rather to be of value.

-Albert Einstein

Repeating Things That Don't Work

The definition of insanity as we know is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting a different result.

Few would admit to acting insane, but so many of us repeat ineffective behaviors.

Don't beat yourself up, even very smart and ambitious people often fall into this trap.

We so want things to be right, so we're usually susceptible to hubris. Remember that two of our most significant barriers in life are our egos and blind spots.

Don’t get stuck in the trap of repeating something that isn’t working. A job, relationship or method of doing something. Pause, step back and take a different look at the problem.

Seek unbiased experts that will give you a second more objective opinion. Find mentors to hold you accountable and put guard rails in place if you are doing the wrong thing.

Obsessive Over Thinking/Analyzing

So many people are planning intently or waiting for that one breakthrough that will drive them to action. They seek to plan out and analyze everything they do as if life were a road map that will transform their life if they obsess over details.

The problem is that there are no tricks or shortcuts to success.

Waiting, debating, and deliberating is your obstacle. Action is the answer.

You can have the best plan, strategy or routine, but it’s worthless if you don’t implement it.

Neglecting Personal Relationships

On a more relational level, a major mistake in life can be taking loved ones for granted or allowing important relationships to deteriorate by not tending to them like a garden.

Human connection is a fundamental aspect of a fulfilling life and neglecting it can lead to isolation, certain mental health issues and regret.

Of course, avoiding toxic relationships is key in preserving your mental health and protecting your positive energy.

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Being Overly Impatient with Long Term Progress

Success in anything takes persistence, failures along the way and hard dedication. People tend to set huge goals for themselves that may set them up for disappointment.

They’ll say they want to have a million dollars by the time they're 35 or get a flat stomach in a month or two. But exam their daily routine, and you’ll find a lack of priority.

They’ll get frustrated at what it takes to obtain their goals, skip workouts to go to happy hour or binge Netflix instead of working on their long-term goals.

Next thing you know they're complaining about not making progress, throwing in the towel and blaming either a system or technique.

Staying on course is hard. It’s fine to take a break – none of us can stay 100% disciplined all the time.

But it's important to ask yourself if you're really willing to make the sacrifices necessary or are they unrealistic?

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Reading/Viewing Only What You Agree

A 2008 study out of the University of Maryland analyzed the diaries and TV watching time of 30,000 adults.

They found that unhappy people watched 20% more television than unhappy people. In the past decade, Netflix, YouTube, and other streaming services have outpaced TV, but the psychological effect is the same.

In times of crisis like these, people flock to media outlets for constant news updates and politics.

They might justify an addiction to these sources as ‘staying informed.’ But studies show that we tend to choose news that only reaffirms our biases. In other words, we select news that fits our views. Is that expanding our knowledge?

We’re better informed when we broaden our media sources and listen to opinions we might disagree with.

Seeing Things for Worse Than They Are

Studies have shown that 4 out of 5 of our thoughts are negative, and 19 out of 20 are repetitive.

For most of us, our internal dialogue tunes to a pessimist radio. Featured negative talk includes, 'this could only happen to me'.

Embracing reality (not denying it) and dealing with it is tough but there's no benefit whatsoever in seeing things for worse than they really are.

And if things in your life are at an all-time low, there's steps anyone can take to reverse it.

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Ignoring Personal Growth and Self-Care

We are not robots, and we require personal care. Failing to nurture and invest in oneself, whether through mental development, wellness tips, or self-care, can also be a significant oversight.

Neglecting personal well-being can lead to a diminished quality of life and prevent individuals from fully experiencing and enjoying their journey.

Assuming Only Big Changes Matter

A few years ago, I asked myself why so few people manage to achieve their highest goals.

My immediate thought was fear, but why do our dreams scare us? In The Kaizen Way, author Dr. Robert Maurer reasons that massive goals trigger an amygdala hijack. That is the “fight-or-flight” response to a perceived threat.

It’s why when someone vows to lose 50 pounds or earn a seven-figure income, their inner skeptic goes crazy.

Instead, Maurer implores his readers to start with super small goals that sneak past the amygdala.

For example, committing to just a few minutes of walking each day or earning a few extra dollars through a side hustle.

I’ve found this approach to be incredibly practical. Commit to a modest life change and repeat it daily until it compounds into a major one.

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Thinking That Money Is Everything

We all need money to have comfort in this world unfortunately. At the very least, we need food and shelter to survive.

Yet, more money can only improve our lives up to a certain point. Despite this, some put money above everything, including their morals.

Hence the term “money is the root of all evil.” Western society puts money on a lofty pedestal, which is why so many westerners remain unhappy.

We all need to make a decent living, but in the end the ones who love you won't care about the amount in your bank account.

Don’t fool yourself into thinking that you need more 'stuff' and have to 'keep up with the Jones' to have a happy and fulfilling life.

Conclusion

While mistakes are an inevitable part of the human experience and essential for growth, living inauthentically makes a huge impact because touches on the essence of what it means to be human: the quest for meaning, fulfillment, love and connection. Recognizing and aligning with one's authentic self, embracing vulnerability, and making conscious choices that reflect individual values and aspirations can lead to a life of fewer mistakes, regrets and offer much richer experiences. It's never too late to start recognizing some of the mistakes you're making in life and start living more authentically. In doing so this can transform one's sense of purpose and happiness.

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